MLA’s day out

Some basic knowledge of the political scenario in Kerala is a must for reading this post. This is one of my first attempts in the rare ventures I make in a world outside “I-me-myself”.
The Characters have slight resemblance with anyone living or dead. This is a creative pursuit with minor elements of truth in the incidents.

Concerned about the lack of physical exercise and degenerating sportsman spirit among the legislators in God’s own country, the Assembly Sports Meet was held for the legislators to showcase their talents. Apart from staging walk-outs, burning their calories in verbal assaults during assembly proceedings and gaining more calories after feasting on the parota and chicken sneaked in from the fancy restaurants near the Legislative assembly during hunger strikes, this was an opportunity for the members to prove their mettle in the field of sports. Heart, sugar, pressure and cholesterol the four words which haunt anyone who has crossed 45 years of age seemed to have no effect on our beloved legislators.
Officially it is stated that the Sports meet was a part of the Golden Jubilee celebrations of the Kerala Legislative Assembly.

The entire assembly was divided into teams led by the CM, Speaker and Deputy Speaker and other important namesake figures. It was amusing to note that people who couldn’t stand each other in the assembly premises were teamed up together and exhibited true sportsmanship with stray incidents of kaalumaaral, paara vekkal (backtracking, sabotaging etc) and the like.

The two days of physical exercise and fun culminated in a grand fashion with almost 1/4th of the Legislative assembly suffering from major and minor health hazards, stress,strains and sprains, twists and turns. Currently they are enjoying their stay in the VIP suites of multi-speciality hospitals.

Our own teacher kicked off the injury/casualty series by twisting her right arm. Sources say that when teacher visited the hospital to set her arm right, the hospital authorities mistook it for a surprise visit and was accorded a ceremonial welcome. Teacher was groaning and writhing in pain and it took a while for the hospital authorities to figure out the problem. How I wish all this suffering would haunt her with memories of the plight of the parents of the Kilirur girl, those new-Born’s at SAT who died coz of carelessness and her,” I don’t care attitude”, the hundreds in the state who still suffer from the consequences of chikungunya which spread all over the state while people are wondering whatever happened to the funds received from the centre to curb the epidemic.

The man who is responsible for all the money, those land scams and everything to do with the money flowing in and out of the state (read party offices) suffered from a muscle strain. It is alleged that CM himself was venting his frustration on the money-man coz of the hot-soup he landed all of them into, with respect to HMTHDIL land scam.

The famous MLA from Kazhakootam also strained a muscle. This must have been done deliberately by someone who suspected he would change sides again and become an (obstacle) opponent to his own team. Preventive measure you see. You never know when this man will change sides.

The man who has managed to keep a decent image so far, managing the water resources of the state deserves kudos for playing till the end without any consideration for his injury.

It was no surprise when the CM’s team which is known for scoring numerous goals ( goal adi is a term used in Malayalam to point out blunders) over the years, won the football match.

The disobedient spoilt brat of the lot, the proclaimed atheist, the manipulator in-charge of education in a 100% literate state landed in the ICU with his sugar levels going down at the end of the two-day long sports meet.

Sunday saw the 50 years (of making public a fool) celebrations with cultural events being organized and the legislators exhibiting their talents in just one field they are adept at, acting.
We can very well imagine the DRAMA that must have been staged with improvising dialogues and making use of this opportunity to express their aggression against one-another.

Yours truly was wondering how to conclude this post when today’s newspaper came in as a blessing.

The cherry on the cake was…

More than 100 out of about 140 MLA’s refrained from attending a seminar on “Qualitative changes in Assembly Proceedings” as part of the Golden Jubilee celebrations. The turn-out was less than 20 with many of them citing reasons like injuries suffered during the sports events and the rest stating obviously unreasonable reasons.

When the number of sittings of the assembly has reduced drastically, including the days lost in boycotts, walkouts and dharnas , while the common man is left in the lurch why would they attend a seminar on qualitative changes? The only qualitative change maybe observed in rising standards of quibbles and carps, physical assaults and in our own terms kayyettam, vaakkutharkkam, koolithallu, vettumkuthum etc. The tactics employed are cost-effective and yield instantaneous results. Ini enthonnu quality? (What more qualitative changes do we need?)

Fools like me read all this in newspaper, laugh our guts out on the mockery and step-back from reacting. Why?

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2 responses to “MLA’s day out

  • Philip

    lol 😀
    Reality mixed with a liberal dose of sarcasm is how I like humour to be served. This one fits the bill perfectly.
    Especially loved the part where teacher goes to the hospital 😀

  • Nikhil Narayanan

    The cabinet leave MLAs has enough bunch of jokers and idiots which include the Electricity minister among others.
    Had they not been ministers some of them, would NEVER have got a decent job.
    Nannavum nannavum enn prateeksha ….
    Leave corruption and stuff…some jack asses need to be shown the door.

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